by Noah Magen
ANNOUNCER : Are you feeling self-conscious? Do you look in the mirror and see a twig staring back? Well head on over to Gain-a-Lot- the newest member in our food loving society. At Gain-a-Lot we have state-of-the-art facilities made with you in mind to help you gain that wanted weight in no time. With friendly staff and an easy access website you can become a member in no time! In these hard times pop culture promotes being skinny almost emaciated. We say stop that nonsense! People should look as they want to look. With the use of high performance Caltine Bars, Big Feasts, and Flat screen TV's you can go from 180 to 210 in just ONE WEEK!!! Gain-a-lot's personal trainers will help you gain more than 30 pounds a week for only $19.99 a month.
GIRL : “Well I have been looking for a good weight gain center for a few years now and I have finally found it! Gain-a-Lot has helped me gain over 100lbs in just one month!”
Personal Trainer : “I love working here the people are great and it's a fun, safe, and phat environment.”
Wrestler(man w/ low gargaly voice): “After I lost the WWE championships last year I knew what to do, go to Gain-a-Lot. One year later and 200lbs stacked on I won that championship with ease.”
Announcer : Just as the fine members and staff said Gain-a-lot is the place to be in this new self-conscious era. Just log on to www.B.E.L.L.Y.com and sign up for our 2-week trial. Gaining weight is fun, fast, and with gain-a-lot really easy. So come on down to Gain-a-lot to get that look you've always wanted.
Gain-A-Lot
